The Things She Says

I hear Z in the bathroom, laughing.

"MUAAAAHAHAHAA...."

"HE-HE-HE-HE HAAAAA..."

"HAW HAW HAW HAW HAAAAA..."

"Z, what are you doing?"


She turns away from the mirror. "Working on my evil laugh. All evil queens should have one."

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"Nobody likes me, every body hates me, I eat worms..." I sing as we eat gummy worms for dessert.

"Momma, nobody doesn't like me. Everyone loves me. I am awesome. I am the greatest. You should be more like me..."

I am so glad she has the gift of humility.

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When Z finds a new word she likes to experiment with it, try it out in new and different places to figure out where it belongs.

Last week's word was lame.

It is now a bad word.

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On Christmas morning, upon discovering the bounty of gifts under the tree: "YES! I FINALLY MADE IT TO THE GOOD LIST!!!!"

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The Goodyear blimp flew over our grocery store the other night. I pointed it out and said, "Look at that big balloon."

"I think it looks more like a pregnant plane."

"Actually, it's blimp. That's a balloon that people can fly."


Now, everything is a blimp or she is going to turn me into a blimp or the dog is just a silly blimp.

Blimp may be banned next...

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I had to add some more because I can't sleep and I just remembered them...


Playing doctor, Z says, "I have to examine your testes and then I will tell you when you are having my brother and sister." (Probably not my testes that need to be examined.)


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To the Scare Bear whose mother is a semi-truck driver.

"Um, Scare Bear, I hate to tell you this but...your mother lives in a truck."

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We have to have a kid exchange in a parking lot every night of the workweek (the Hubs works nights). As he is kissing me good-bye the voice in the backseat screams, "Quit having sex with my mother!"