Daddy-Daughter Dance

Every year, I dress up the girl and she and her daddy go on a date. 

Daddy Daughter dates from over the years. 

This year is no different.

I love them. I really, really do. 

The Mysteries of Life (Continued)

***This post is a continuation from yesterday. You can find the beginning of the story here.***

"OH!"

Her eyes light up as she crawls across my body to exit the bed. Of course, she presses on my bladder as she goes, it wouldn't be a morning wake up if she didn't.

"Z, Daddy is laying right here. What are you doing?," I ask as I start to pull myself up out of the bed.

"His face is over here, I need to see his face so I know that he is hearing me." So much like her mother, I think as she completes her route around the bed.

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! Guess what is living under our porch! Guess what it is, Daddy! You won't even believe it, I bet your eyes will pop out of your head when you hear about it, Daddy! It's a CAT, Daddy! We can't let it come in yet though because it doesn't care about us yet. But we are gonna feed it and love it and talk to it and then and then and then when it cares about us, we can let it move in our house FOREVER! Isn't that great, Daddy? Isn't it?"

"That's not what I said", I call out from the bathroom, smiling to myself. "And after you went to bed, Z, I found out that there are two-"

"OHMYGOSH!!! THANK YOU, JESUS and GOD for answering all of my prayers!!! DADDY, DADDY there are two! Now we will have a brother and a sister for Oliver. Oliver will be so happy to finally have his whole family in our house. Oh, isn't it wonderful news, Daddy? I am so excited! Let's go outside and see if we can pet them."

"Not right now, how about some breakfast first?"

"YES! I am so glad that you are awake now, Momma. I wrote a song about how happy I am, do you want to hear it? Okay, okay, okay."

She grabs the Hubs old high school tennis racket and holds it like a guitar in front of her. It's an old "guitar" so for some reason she has to sing like she is an old man at a campfire. With a southern accent.

"Momma, thank you so much for waking up with meeeee

You are the best but only I can seeeeee

That you make me very happppppyyyyy..."

"Well, it rhymes. Let's go get some cereal."

She picks up a noisemaker from her birthday party that is laying on my dresser and begins to blow it like a trumpet. The Hubs gives up on trying to sleep now and gets up with us. 

"I made up a new blessing for breakfast today, Momma. Do you want to hear it? Okay, okay, okay. Ahem."

"Oh, God thank you, thank you, thank you. You are God. 

Thank you, thank you, thank you for fooooood.

Thank you God for being God."

"Ah, I could sit here all day and listen to my cereal talk to me. I really like when things talk back to me, this cereal is better than that stupid Oliver cat. He won't ever talk to me. It's because he has no brains, right Momma? No brains at all."

"That's not what I said Z. Please eat your cereal."

"Can I take a shower with you today, Momma, please? I think I kinda stink. I really should take a shower. What is today? Do you have to work? Why do you always have to go to work? Why can't you just stay here with me? What does Wesday mean? What are we gonna do after work today?"

"We have a special church service tonight, so we are gonna go to church."

"YES!!! Thank you, God! Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, did you hear that? We get to go to CHURCH! I love going to church, I get to see all my friends and then we can try to figure out what room God lives in. I think it's in the back, Momma. The part that you don't let me go to. Are you hiding God from me, Momma?"

For the next hour, the chatter continued on like this; while we took a shower and while I got ready for work. She begin to yawn and scrub at her eyes. 

Finally, the Hubs and the daughter laid down on the couch and fell back asleep. 

It's not often that Z gets up with me in the morning. But when she does, the excitement just.doesn't.stop. 

The Mysteries of Life

WAH-WAH-WAH... the alarm clock sounded at exactly 5:30 this morning. Not unlike any other morning, actually. I lifted my hand to stop the madness and a little 4 year old voice came from behind me, startling me out of my must-hit-snooze stupor.

"Finally, someone is awake. I am so happy that you are finally awake. I have been laying here for forever waiting for someone to talk to me and play with me. Why can't cats talk? I keep talking to Oliver but he won't talk back to me. Daddy bought milk at the store yesterday so that I could have Priskies for breakfast - "

"You mean, Rice Krispies?"

"Yeah, those. Momma, when will the alarm clock go off again? You are not all the way up yet and I am SOOOO tired of laying in this bed. Can't we turn on the light and talk? I really need to know about my cat. Do you think something is wrong with him? I really can't wait until he starts talking to me like a normal person."

"What are the numbers on the clock?"

Much shuffling as she makes her way to her knees to peer over my shoulder.

"Three...Zero...Six" (I keep the alarm clock 32 minutes fast because I cannot do math when I am just waking up in the morning and every time I look at it I think I am running late. Also, in case you had not guessed this, Z reads from right to left. It's a start, at least all of the numbers were correct.)

I clear my throat. "Six minutes. In six minutes the alarm clock will go off and I will get up."

"Okay. I have to pee though. Now, momma." She climbs over me, causing the blankets and the cat to go crashing to the floor. "Oops." She turns on the bathroom light and it is now shining in my eye, like a lighthouse on a dark and stormy night. I glare at her small frame wrestling with her panties, trying to figure out where all of this energy and life has come from.

She sprints back into the bed. "Now, momma. Please tell me. Explain to me why Oliver is not speaking to me."

"Because cats have different vocal chords and smaller brains."

"But one day, when I am old, I will have a smaller brain and my head won't be so big. Will I forget how to talk? Will Oliver be able to talk and then I won't be able to talk back to him? Won't he be heartbroken then? Oh, momma, why does my head have to shrink."

I need a shrink, I think as I roll over to face her. "Your head is not going to shrink. Look at my gigantic head. It has only grown since I was a little girl -"

"A long, long time ago right, momma? You were a little girl long, long ago. But now you are huge and you have a big, fat head."

"Yeah, so anyway, your cat is never going to be able to talk to you. We do not live in Narnia, cats cannot talk on Earth."

"But one day, Oliver will be a lion and he will be able to live in the woods like a wild cat and we will miss him. That happened once to my other cat, Brussel Sprout. He turned into a tiger and lives in the woods."

At this point, I need a break. I need to use the bathroom and get my bearings. I turn on the Hubs, who had just come in from work a little over an hour ago.

"Z, did you tell Daddy what's living under the porch?"

To Be Continued...