Zoe has reached the stage of her life that she needs to sleep in her own bed. I need to get some sleep at night and she likes to play for extended portions of the night when she is sleeping with me. Last night was her first night in her own room in her own bed. Here is how the night played out.
7:45 PM - Time for a bath. Zoe loves the bath and likes to splash and play in there.
8:00 PM - Into the rocker for some loving time with mommy. I read her a book and then nursed her.
8:28 PM - I laid her down in her bed, kissed her goodnight and turned on her monitor. It plays soft music and projects the moon and stars on the ceiling. I turned off all of the lights and closed the bedroom door almost all the way.
8:33 PM - The monitor has stopped playing music and the projector is no longer running. Now the screaming begins.
8:50 PM - The screaming has stopped, there is no sound. Is she okay? Should I go in there? I decide to stay grounded and wait.
8:56 PM - I can take it no longer and I rush in to make sure it is all okay. I snap a picture of my soundly sleeping baby and leave the room.
11:05 PM - I climb into bed as quietly as I can and pull the covers up over me.
11:06 PM - The screaming begins. I nurse her, lay her back down in her crib, and turn on the monitor again. She coos happily while the moon and stars dance across her ceiling, and then begins to cry again 5 minutes later when the monitor shuts off. I lay in my bed sobbing for the next fifteen minutes, knowing that I am the world's worst mother and I will never get the hang of this. Finally, she and I both cry ourselves to sleep.
5:30 AM - The alarm clock goes off signaling that it is time for us to start all over again. She woke up happy this morning.