Hello. My name is Heather and I am an addict.
I love that liquid gold crack that I can buy at any corner store. That bright yellow stuff of the Gods. I am talking, of course, about my Mountain Dew habit (fine, addiction).
Being the semi-moronic nut job that I am, I decided that today would be a fine day to start giving up my addiction. I am currently battling a raging sinus infection that I am trying to just let play out because I am terrified of building up an immunity to antibiotics, lest I be the one person on Earth that can defeat drug-resistant bacterias one day, and therefore am hopped up on all kinds of ingredients for meth.
Last night as I was trying to lay still and allow my body to heal, I noticed that I am all kinds of twitchy which led to the following conversation with myself.
"Self, you are crazy twitchy."
"It might be the Mountain Dew."
"Are you sure it is not the 8000 throat lozenges that you took today trying to get rid of your sore throat and cough? Or maybe it's the cough syrup that you get withdrawals from exactly 3 and half hours after you take it? It can't be the Dew, the Dew is our friend."
"That's bullshit, man, bullshit. They just want us to believe that."
"Who are they?"
And that starts off a whole other conversation in my head that causes me to lie awake pondering the "theys" of the planet. (It's always something, isn't it?)
This morning I woke up knowing that today is the day I quit. I knew it this morning. I bravely drove past the convenience store with their 44-ounce 69-cent wares. I sipped from my bottle of half frozen water feeling empowered, awakened.
But now it is 2:30. I don't feel good. Everything aches.
And I want my Mountain Dew. I want it SO bad.
I need an Anonymous group. They just can't call it MDA.
What is your addiction? Have you beat it before? For how long?