I am not going to say that this is all about another woman. I could say that, and try to place blame on homewreckers and white trash and whatever.
But I am not going to say that because it wouldn't all be true.
There are two people responsible for what is going on here. Two people in this marriage that is going downhill faster than a Mack Truck on ice without brakes.
I am one of them, the Hubs is the other.
And whatever he did, or didn't do, with any other women is all about him. He is the one that made a commitment, that said the vows, that swore before me and God and a clerk of the court that we would never be in this place.
I am not going to tell myself that I drove him to it, because looking over the last almost 7 years, I can't find any evidence that anything that I have done would have caused this big of a hole in our continuum. I am not going to drive myself crazy with the "if's" and "could'ves", because quite honestly, I refuse to accept the blame for this.
Which is good, because he is willing to accept all of it.
What I am going to say to any of you weak, unhappy spouses out there, you men that may think a hint of flirtation from a co-worker means that you are guaranteed to be happier with that young thing instead of the wife that you have at home - cheat up.
If you are going to ruin your relationship with a woman that has done your laundry, cooked your dinner, worked two jobs to support you while you were unemployed, and birthed your babies, please for the love of ALL that is holy - cheat up.
Because you are going to wreck her self-esteem, you are gonna make her think that she is not worthy of love and respect and security and honor, there is no stopping that.
But when she Googles that person that's been texting you or writing on your Facebook wall and sees that she is dog ass ugly and fat and that there seems to be no redeeming qualities about her at all (including the fact that she is also currently married), well, that may just cause the woman that you promised forever to to think that she is even more of a failure than she already is, that may cause her to feel like she really doesn't deserve any of the thousands of things that God promises women who are virtuous and true and forgiving.
It may just cause her to hate you and there is no coming back from hate when it burns like this.
So for God's sake, find a cute college co-ed that could model in Sports Illustrated or Cosmo, find someone that your wife would understand you wanting to be with.
You know, that or don't friggin' cheat on your wife.
Just my two cents.