- Do not feed or water the small creatures after dark, unless you enjoy delayed bedtimes, late night play times or wet beds.
- Do not try to walk quietly through the quiet house in the dark - sharp objects will impale tender areas of your body.
- Do not sleep as soundly as you did in your youth - small creatures will awaken you with their screams, or worse, will just come in to your room silently, press their nose against yours and wait.
- Do not question what that fluid sitting in a bucket in the closet is - you really don't want to know.
- Do not investigate that loud bang outside of your bedroom window in the middle of the night. Just hide under the covers, the covers will protect you.
- When someone comes into the room screaming, and possibly bleeding, you really do not need to know what they did to cause it.
- That girl? The one that always seems so innocent? She is really the culprit.
- When children tell you that there is a ghost in the house, believe them.
- When you call out a name and no one answers, it's probably better not to know what is going on in there.
10. When all else fails - go to the light.