Tuesday, May 10, 2011

To Sleep Perchance to Dream

3:29 AM

3 - friggin' - 29 AM.

Apparently, my body and my brain have conspired against any chance I may have of getting any rest whatsoever. Every single night for the last few months, I have stared at those numbers in bright glaring red on my alarm clock. 3:29 AM.

I have tried everything.

In bed at 10 PM, blissfully laying down after a hard day? 3:29 AM - wide awake.

Falling asleep on the living room couch in front of the TV? 3:29 AM - wide awake, crick in my neck and shivering cold.

Falling asleep while reading Z her bedtime story? 3:29 AM - stumbling down the hall, crick in my neck, shivering cold and angry that the Hubs is either not home yet or decided not to take me into bed.

Stumbling into bed at 1 AM because of a good movie or book - 3:29 AM trying to figure out the deeper meanings to the movie or book.

It's not just waking up at 3:29 AM - it is being so wide awake at such an awful time of the morning. Staring at the clock as the minutes that seem like hours blink back at you without reprieve. Mind swirling with what-ifs and have tos. Body aching with desire for more sleep or itching with boredom to get up and do more laundry, run to the grocery store, wash the dishes, clean the playroom, setup new website and on and on and on.

Some nights (or mornings) I am able to lay there long enough listening to the Hubs snoring and the ticking of the clock that I can actually fall asleep - right before my alarm begins to blast that it is time to start yet another day. Other nights seem to drag on forever and I can accomplish so much before having to wake the Hubs and child for the day.

The refrigerator has never been so clean, the laundry has never been so done, the kitchen floor could double as a dining area - but by Noon all of that strength, all of that awakeness is sapped out of my being and I am left limp, useless and exhausted.

I am at a loss for explanation of why my body has chosen such a random time to set as it's alarm. I would just like to sleep again, maybe have a few dreams, and wake up refreshed, ready to begin my day instead of growling at the alarm clock.

Any ideas, tips or pointers?


  1. Yes Mam I have an idea! I also suffer from severe insomnia at times and so I do feel your pain and exhaustion. I have learned, however, that when you are being awakened like that at the same time nightly that it may very likely be God! I know....how annoying of God! I do not know why, but these wee hours of the morning are very powerful times to pray. And God will wake you to pray for certain things. So get quiet. Don't clean. Get out your Bible or a journal. Pray for whoever and whatever pops in your head no matter how strange or random it may be. I do believe that God is waking you up to pray. Try it! Good luck, and may you sleep again SOON! :) Jess

  2. I agree. I have tried praying after waking long before I need to. You may find that you relax and are able to go back to sleep.

  3. o yes, pray! talk to God about whatever comes into your head, and likely it'll be something you need to deal with or someone you need to help. and at the very least, ask God to quieten you and help you sleep :) DON'T let the devil set up this stronghold in your head, thinking that there's something about 3:29am - your body will start getting into the habit of waking up then!

    it's funny you brought this up, because just last night during my prayers I was praying about something similar, and the words "Pavlovian conditioning" popped up. I'm going to look that up today haha


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