An Open Letter

Dear Creators of Children's Programming,

I was originally going to write this letter to you to thank you for giving me a way to grab a shower by myself, throw a load of laundry into the machine and check some other momma's blogs.

Unfortunately, I was feeling a bit under the weather this week so I actually got to partake in a few of your mundane shows. I am not sure if you are in on the government plot to dumb down my child or if you are intentionally trying to get thousands of preschoolers killed, but I know that I have officially lost brain cells as well as precious minutes of my life enduring your shows.

What has happened to children's television?

I can still watch the same shows that I used to watch on Saturday mornings on Netflix (now with my child) and still find them amusing (and, especially, tolerable). The shows that children are now being force fed are merely just filler between commercials for high-priced silly toys and expensive shoes.

When I worked for a daycare, I often wondered how it was that a 3 year old would know whether another child was wearing Skechers, Nikes or a knock off. Now I know. I have also been informed by my child that the "Twinkle Toes" at Payless are not the same shoe.

Sad.

These shows (if you can call 18 minutes of actual plot a show) mostly revolve around other apparent preschoolers who have no parental guidance. They go on adventures, cross the street, talk to strangers, build things with REAL tools, perform high wire acts on clotheslines - all without any of the reality of a mother having all of her air sucked out of her lungs as she swoops forward, snatching said child from certain death and placing them into their room until the shaking dies down.

Perhaps you have read too many other mommy blogs that revolve around glasses of wine and activities designed to quiet our children and get them out of our hair. Please understand that these are "tongue-in-cheek" jokes, meant to help encourage other mothers out there in "the field".

I know that it is my responsibility to monitor my child's television habits. I understand that I must take an ounce of humility in this situation and admit that I was allowing her to watch shows that I thought would be safe. I was wrong and so are you.

You have a responsibility to the parents of this country. The parents that are trying so much harder than to just survive, but to also raise their kids with a bit of good moral fiber and strong values. If you teach them to avoid authority figures, not ask for permission before doing things that could be potentially dangerous, if you show them that all adults are just stupid fools - then you are doing a major disservice to these children and to this country.

My child will be watching a lot of VeggieTales and 80's cartoons until things change. At least I won't have to worry about buying "REAL" Twinkle Toes anymore.

Sincerely,

A Very Weary Momma